Smile

On the verge of hyperventilating, I sat down at a table with my daughter's friend's family and said "I'm sorry, I get very overwhelmed at the awkwardness of social occasions". The mom was surprised, being that our daughters were being inducted into the National Thespian Society. We spent the rest of time smiling at each other, attempting small talk, and delighting in the entertainment of the madness surrounding us. Every child was dressed up, every entree was showcased in a decorated booth. I love events! I love the creativity, games, and fun and the interesting food. I helped create the award winning table "Panda" Asian Table and I'm going to have such fun collecting costumes for Autumn for the next few years. And I was so very proud of Autumn. She was asked to lead a troupe next year which will emphasize awareness, such as suicide prevention, harmful choices, and celebrating culture and people groups. She received a "will" from the graduating President, as an honor for her bubbly personality and a request to fill her shoes. Yet just a month ago she was depressed that she felt she had something to contribute to the world but did not understand what it was. She was tired from all her hard work and was giving up on friendships. Its amazing to me how the winter season so drastically changes and you realize all your potential, the friendships blossoming around you, and the spring of life and opportunities just around the corner. This week she had a friend hospitalized after attempting suicide and Mike's MINI buddy took his own life. You just feel so selfish, and self centered that you couldn't extend yourself, your life and happiness. That you were so tired and your well had run dry that you couldn't help someone hurting even worse. That you couldn't offer just enough hope to limp them around the corner. I pray that even in the dark seasons, the socially awkward times, and when it feels almost unnatural, that I will radiate hope and love. That I will find a peace in God that will extend to those I love just being around them. And that I will see more opportunities to be kind or helpful, or simply to smile.